Sunday, September 20, 2009

Remembering Where I am and Where I have been

After my horrendous run this morning, I spent some time reflecting and here's where I finally came to and how I feel so much better.

My problem today was completely tied to my chronic condition (fibromyalgia coupled with groups of doctors diagnosing lumbar facet syndrome and osteoarthritis), no pace would have left me with a smile on my face. Every day I'm doing so much more than the doctors ever expected, and if I have a bad run every once in a while, I'm already winning, because that's way less bad runs than a ton in my condition. Many with fibromyalgia are never this active. Even the pregnancy gave me a lot of problems!

I've been sick since I was 13, but this month celebrates 9 years since I chose to stop taking any and all painkillers, completely managing my condition by mind over pain. Thank you to my running friends for the reminder that it was just one run, which is far more significant to me with what I've outlined. The days when the pain is worse are the days it's harder to remember that. Today's run was given to me today to remind me of how much more active I am than years ago, how much more active than I was ever supposed to be, where I have been, and why I'm where I am now - and why a bad run is still success!

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